You are forbidden to send email or make telephone calls to me. You
are ESPECIALLY PROHIBITED from driving to my home and trespassing on
my private property. I don't give a **** if you think you're Jesus,
pal.
1. Violent death threats do not intimidate me or my family.
2. Racial and ethnic epithets are boring, unoriginal, and subject to
enhanced criminal sentences.
3. Huge ****ographic images will not crash my server, any image
attachments exceeding 5MB are automatically discarded.
4. Emails with trojans and viruses attached will not infect my
machine. The antivirus/antispyware prevents the opening of such
attachments and quarantines the offending files.
5. Heavy breathing coupled with obscenities on the telephone are
recorded and surrendered to the appropriate officials.
Your immediate compliance with this order is non-negotiable.
